Keeping Your Mom From Driving You Nuts

No matter how good a bride’s relationship with her mother is, there is a good chance that a wedding is going to be an emotionally charged day, and it might be one that is made more difficult rather than less difficult by the bride’s mother. If you are looking to make sure that the wedding does not get taken over by a mother who feels that it is her show rather than her daughter’s, you will find that there are some things that you should keep in mind.

The first thing that you should think about is why the mother of the bride is acting in an overbearing way. If this is just the extension of the way that she always acts, that’s one thing, but keep in mind that you should consider if her behavior is brand new and strange. There is a chance that she is feeling threatened by the wedding, or that she has mixed feelings about it. Perhaps she is in a place where the entire concept of her daughter getting marries frightens her, or perhaps there is an element of jealousy there.

On the other hand, if the relationship between bride and mother has always been rather strained, more subversive techniques might be called for. Simply be clear about what is going on, who is going to be involved and make sure that contact is limited. If, as the bride’s friend, you want to make sure that she is going to be okay, offer to run interference, whether by keeping her mother occupied or by letting the bride hide out for a few hours at your place.

In the end, remember that your mother is still going to be your mother long after the stress of the wedding is past. Even if she drives you a little crazy during the wedding planning, just remind yourself that “this too shall pass”, and before you know it you will be a newlywed – hopefully one with a relaxed mother!